How to make Midori's Dildo Harness w Scarves

I created this totally cool DIY dildo harness design - and I'm often asked on how to make it, so I'm posting it here to share.
(Yes, I should have photos with this. Soon, my friends. Soon.)

I've encountered enough challenges with so many of the commercially made harnesses, and I know many people also have other issues (privacy, finance, etc) - thus the invention.

Features and advantages

* Fits everyone!
* Adjust to position where you want it. (no more pressing on the full bladder or rubbing on the pelvic bone.)
* Sex is messy, what with sweat, cum, lube and more.
* This is totally easy to wash. After shagging just toss in the washer and dryer. No more leather care. No more hanging on the laundry line.
* Camoflages well if children, room-mates or in-laws are a concern.
* No buckles to stab you. No Velcro to scratch you. No excess straps to adjust and tuck or extenders to add.
* Much better dildo to harness-wearer contact.
* Air-travel friendly. Goes on to carry-on or wear it as a scarf for those cold cabins.
* The bit of excess serves as a "Harder-Now" handle for the sex bottom. Or serves well as lube towels.
* People who grew their own dicks. They can wear this harness over their home-grown cock - so they can have two!
* Full access to the bits between the legs. What ever bits you have.
* Makes one's ass look fabulous! Butt lifting goodness.
*

Equipment needed for the Midori Scarf Harness:

* 1 favorite dildo with flanged base
* 2 scarves (suggested length: multiply hip measure x 1.5. Example 40” hip x 1.5 = 60” scarves)
* 2 or more fun people who play well together
*

Directions for the Midori Scarf Harness:

1. Take Scarf A and make a loose over-hand knot (“That Knot” if spoken in Midori) at it’s midpoint.
2. Take Scarf B, place through That Knot, bisecting the Scarf B. Scarf B will now be hanging with two equal length parts.
3. Take dildo and insert to That Knot.
4. Tighten Scarf A and That Knot firmly around dildo.
5. Tie Scarf A snugly and low around the hip. It’s easiest to tie this in front, with the dildo at one’s back and then turn the scarf around. Very important that it be snug.
6. Place dildo in desired position on the body.
7. Take one end of Scarf B, hanging from the dildo. Move it back between the legs and under the butt cheek, ending near the hip bone. Tie onto Scarf A near hip bone.
8. Repeat for remaining end of Scarf B.
9. Test for security of whole harness.
10. Shag


Enjoy!

Midori

Overheard conversation - "too weird"

A dear friend of mine in Copenhagen shared this little experience with me and I thought you'd enjoy it.

= = =

It was one of those October evenings, when the weather was mild - almost like spring - and I was sitting at my local cafe at one of the outdoor tables, with a blanket around me, sipping tea, smoking my pipe and reading the newspaper, when two girls in their mid thirties sat down at the next table. One was sitting with her back to me, the other one opposite to her. Nice girls. Well dressed, attractive.

They started talking, and I continued with tthe newspaper. However, we were so close, i could not help overhearing their conversation.

The girl who was facing me asked the other girl if she was still seeing this guy, and the other girl replied "No, he's out, he was too weird".

"Really", said the other girl, "I thought he was kinda cute".

"Too weird" her friend repeated.

"But you seemed to get along very well. What happened?"

"Clogs"

"Clogs? What do you mean?"

"He wanted me to wear clogs, wooden Dutch-style clogs. He bought me clogs. He wanted me to wear them, walk around in them. Wear them, you know."

"Are you serious", she laughed.

"I am dead serious. It turned him on. He's out. Too weird."

"It's pretty harmless, isn't it"?

"I don't know. Maybe. But too weird. I don't have sex with clogs. had it been leather or rubber or whips and chains, I could have accepted that, it's normal, but clogs? He freaked me. End of story. What about you, have you started in your new job or is that next month?"

... and they talked on about this and that and i chuckled inside and enjoyed how openly they spoke about it ... and also realized, that some fetishes are just too weird. I'm so happy I'm not into bicycle front wheel spokes.

= = =

LoveSeat docu video up!

A big huge thanks for Juliet Heart for filming the creation and destruction of the LoveSeat at the 2009 Seattle Erotic Art Festival. She followed it for days, arranged for amazing interviews, edited and styled it. If it weren't for her tireless help in this, this work wouldn't be documented. (I am lousy about documenting my own work - I'm working on getting better at it and getting better in asking for help.)
Thank you Juliet!

Enjoy the docu!
(Are blow-up dolls in an art gallery work safe or NSFW?)
K also posted this up in my art site, Ranshin.com I need to be better about keeping that up.

Artists's notes on Femina Potens performance 8/22/09

Pardon my blathering and unorganized thoughts on this post. Think of this as me "talking out loud" in creating the artist's statement for the performance piece I committed at the Femina Potens art gallery's "Art of Restraint" event.

Action

DJ starts my music. Arabian pop tunes fill the little gallery as attendees mill about.

Me and my crew are in their places.
- Me: performer, dressed in a deconstructed green kimono. (similar to one of my usual characters)
- Zille: performer, dressed in a green spandex cat suit
- M: still photography
- N: hand-held video
- J: video handler for wall-mounted surveillance camera
- K: Security & communications
- D: performance assistance
- UM1, UM2, UM3, UM4: performers

The range of ethnicity, heritage, citizenship and orientations represented of the crew is very relevant and intentional in this, as well as garments and the music chosen, but this won't become evident until later. I believe most people missed these details but that's expected. That's why I'm working to document this piece during and after.

As the music starts, I pick up a couple of skeins of rope. The crowd begins to gather around us, anticipating the fourth performance in the evening's series. I lay the rope on Zille and begin to move her around in one of my rope dance styles, controlled and slow but in gradually expanding circles, clearing out a space in the center of the gallery as I gently bind her upper body. The movements are attractive yet pretty conventional. This continues for about five minutes. The audience is comfortable and mildly entertained.
Suddenly the door bursts open and many men in full black uniform and riot gear burst in, pushing me and Zille aside. They form a quick barricading formation before the attendees and raise hands into their faces. No insignias or makings visible.. Two of the four Uniformed Men shout loudly at the attendees to stay calm, don't take photos. Other two Uniformed Men charge through the crowd and confront N, my videographer, a visibly Middle Eastern young man. Loud shouting - possibly Slavic accents. Uniformed Man 1 sprays N in the face with what appears to be pepper spray. (in reality- just water) Uniform Men 1 & 2 quickly subdue N onto floor & cuff him though N struggles and shouts in mixture of Arabic and English. D picks up N's camcorder and attempts to continue recording even as she's shouted at by Uniformed Man 3. Uniformed Men 1 & 2 drag N out the door by the ankles as Unformed Men 3 & 4 trail closely behind. As they leave the room they throw leaflets and booklets into the room. The door slams hard behind them, leaving a confused, tense silence behind.

29 seconds. That's how long the raid took.

In that tense moment I step forward, holding up one of the pamphlets. One is a pamphlet listing basic human rights and other about "Jailed Without Justice", both from Amnesty International. I make a short statement, something to the effect of...
"As we enjoy the fantasies of bondage, please remember the very real incarcerations and bondage in the world today...."

I also thanked the SFPD. I alerted them in advance that a mock kidnapping would take place as a performance action. They were really understanding and coordinated with me by sending out two officers, who tucked their patrol car away and stood by across the street. I did not want any of my performers to be arrested or nearby citizens to call the police thinking it was real trouble. I gotta say SFPD is pretty special. The two young officers totally understood the show concept, thought the surprise action inventive, and then stood by for an hour and a half in the shadows to ensure everyone's safety.
To clarify and prevent any misinformation, the Uniformed Men were not SFPD. They're actor friends of mine and we had rehearsed this intensely.

After the performance action... the four Uniformed Men and N, aka "the Target", drove away in the get-away vehicle and got out of their costumes. The rest of us crew bid our farewell and headed to the rendezvous point. Sadly I missed Margaret Cho's fan-dance with a twist ,as I had to leave for the post-performance meeting point.

Intent

So many of us take for granted the enormous luxury of privacy and civil liberties. We assume that our homes and closed door places of gathering will keep us safe. We speak and write our thoughts without fearing major consequences. We take for granted the notion of justice and individual rights. Yet for many around the world, as well as in our own back yard, these are ideas that are beyond their finger tips, even as they struggle for it. Citizens are disappeared. Doors are broken in. Lines of communicated are hacked. People are intimidated. Voices are silenced. Faces erased. Memories reworked. Lives shaken indelibly.

Persons privileged with privacy and civil liberties read the headlines and watch the news, sense the injustice but as something fuzzy, pixelized, almost unreal and intangible. One moment we're watching the news with all the violence, injustice, and laws created for the expediency of authoritarian power holder, the next moment we're watching CGI crafted games and movies with violence and endless life-points. We live in an insulated entitled sense of safety, security and permanence.

Subset of this privileged citizenry are also those who enjoy the pleasures of adventurous sexual self expression. We play with fantasies, innocent to intense, often borrowing themes and imagery from the darker sides of human behavior and history. Humans have always taken narrative from conflict and taboo, whether in forms of story telling, theater or sexual fantasies - that's nothing new. What's new is the near total separation of our places of perceived danger and personal safety.

Lately I've noticed a definite increase in interest for bondage imagery, porn, entertainment and personal play that depict harsh incarceration, kidnapping and interrogation. I am not sure why this is, but it's happening. Maybe it's a war-weary culture's subconscious search for a coping mechanism, maybe it's over saturation of images and discussions of governing body violence, maybe it's a desensitized culture seeking stimulation... Maybe it's just another sexuality trend as they do come and go...
I don't know.
I am disturbed, though, that so many who enjoy consuming or acting out fantasy actions of detention and incarcerations don't seem to think of the reality of where these images come from. We chatter on about bondage is freedom and art and so on, but so often it just feels like lip-service to transgressiveness when we've nothing to struggle against. Maybe the fascination in bondage is the side affect of hermetically sealed safe lives in search of some signs of being alive?
I just don't know.

A person hooded, on the floor, naked and cuffed.
If the only context or response that one has to this image is a fun Saturday night of role playing at the local kink party, are we starving our own humanity? I'm not saying that we should not play with our dark fantasies and archetypes, but we shouldn't lose sight of the real world human events that necessitate these narratives.

So many of us don't know what it feels like to have our assumed liberties taken away at any moment. We believe that reason prevails and the system will protect the just. We may assume that those detained must have a reason to be detained.
But what if the door burst open when you least expected it, and in a sudden flash of shock and violence someone standing next to you is taken away... You don't know why they were taken. It could have been you.
How does it feel?
How does this affect your perception of world, time, space and security?

In the negative space that was that person taken away, what's left?

Additionally...

Many of us in the crew are individuals who's citizenship status have changed for various reasons, experiencing the impermanence of national identity. We come from different political beliefs, different citizenship, income levels, ethnic identity, orientation and genders. Yet we came together for this performance action believing in liberty being a good thing.
"The Target" was intentionally chosen... He is a person likely to be profiled by authorities in many of today's nations as potentially undesirable. This particular performer is someone who appealed and was granted asylum based on being a persecuted minority who was brutalized at the hands of the authority.
A fortuitous accident in the scheduling put this performance on the first day of Ramadan, which I found interesting.
Even as I visualized, created, gathered the crew, rehearsed and then finally performed - I was very nervous... oh for so many reasons.
Now I gather the video and photo footage and create a video presentation with J's help. I'm looking forward to being able to share this with you.

I still don't have a title for this piece that feels right. I'm working on that....

babbling over for now...

Help! Materials needed for my Sept art exhibition in SF.

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

Thoughts on the new "Best of Bondage" book

I just received the artist's copy of the book "Best of Bondage" from Goliath Publishing
It's one of those fat photo collection books, featuring the works of 8 photographer, including yours truly, and one vintage photo collector.

I'm relieved to see the final product on this project and I'm really happy to be in this book - but I've got mixed feelings about it as well...

The contents are nice and many of the images are hot, so it'll be a lovely edition for home libraries and erotica collections. The varied style represented are fun to savor. I'm going to enjoy having it in my book shelves. The photo reproductions were generally decent for a book like this. Although, having seen the gallery prints on many of these pieces, such as Craig Morey's work and mine, I know that the viewer are missing the richness in many of the finer photos.

The cover image choice I find very disappointing. Of all the images of lust, pleasure and delight in the book, why did they have to put an image of a frightened woman on the cover? As a consumer of erotica and erotic art, as well as a sexuality educator and a woman, this creeps me out. It sends the wrong message about the book and perpetuates a lot of the negative and misguided stereotype of bondage sex.

I'm also uncomfortable with the gender bias of the book.

The title should have been "Super Collection: Rope Bound Women" or "She's All Tied Up" or something like that. All the images are of women tied up. There are 3 faint prop like suggestion of males as the partner of the bound female subject. Men like to get tied up too and some people want to see images of men tied up. I suppose it's a marketing decision - which makes me all the more uncomfortable in regards to the greater acceptance of the objectified female form and the assumption of the male gaze - over the sexualization of masculine form. I'll be thrilled to bits when Goliath (and other publishers) come out with mor male-bound books. When they do, I have a huge body of photographic work for them. Since I focus more on shooting the bound male forms rather than the female forms, it was actually hard for me to find enough images to submit to the editor to choose from.

Another gender bias:
I'm the only female photographer in this collection. It's one of the reasons I accepted the offer to be included. Why are so many of the "recognized" erotic photographers men, when in reality there are so many amazing female photographers creating beautiful, erotic and challenging images? Women like Michele Serchuk and Christine Kessler are creating kick ass images.
I do find it sadly interesting that when it comes to both rope bondage rigging and photography, the female artists seems to get the short end of representation and sometimes suffer subtle and not so subtle patronizing dismissal from their male colleagues and media.
I suppose things haven't changed much in the arts world. The same lament have been documented in most art movements. On my recent visit to the Art Gallery Ontario, to see the "Surreal Things" exhibition organized by London's Victoria & Albert Museum, I read similar experiences of the fine female surrealist artists. Why is the artistic representation of the body and desire necessarily the domain of men? As fiercely sexual beings as well as the oft objectified gender, we have much to say and show of eroticism.

So I found it interesting that the publisher chose to title my work as "Sensual Bondage".
My representation of the female form, especially those in ropes, aren't meant to be sensual. Just take a look at my photos in the book. (But if you see as sensual and enjoy them, I won't complain.) The compositions are often ment to be emotionally disconcerting. The heads of the women are often cut off and the bodies seem tossed away. I like to explore the image that represent the byproduct of exploitation. The possible end result of where the male gazes goes to, yet fear to shed light on it's unspoken conclusion. The commodified, disposable, possessed, replaced, used, broken and discarded things that were once so coveted... It's no accident that many of my shots look like crime scenes. To find the beauty in the broken... Like Blanche in "Street Car Named Desire", like the ruins of temples after brutal wars.

As a contributing artist to a collection I know don't have control over the final collection.
What I can do is to continue to produce works that are true to my artistic vision, keep chugging at it, and use opportunities like this blog to say the things that weren't included in the book or other venues.
I can also seek out venues where I am able to express myself with my full artistic integrity, such as my shows upcoming at the Femina Potens Gallery. I have a performance art piece happening there on August 22 and a month long solo sculpture and installation exhibit there in September. The opportunities, in this current economic climate, maybe scarece, but I'm working away at them.

Forte Femme weekends. Toronto 6/19 & SF 8/14

Hello from the midst of my crazy spring teaching tour! I just returned from Milwaukee/Chicago/Seattle. I have one day in SF (and I'm working with Playboy TV on that one day. Yikes! when do I pack and stuff?)
And I'm off to Toronto for first of my two trips this spring.

I wanted to let you know about this special weekends coming up soon. I've been so busy I'm behind on putting out the information. I apologize. I know many of you have to make plans in advance so here it is.

Please feel free to pass this on to other women. The Toronto weekend is almost full but still has a few seats open.

It's a jam packed weekend where I pour my heart, knowledge and skills out so you can walk out with confidence and abilities to realize your own authentic femme power.

Please let me know if you have any questions about this weekend.

Affectionately,

Midori

~ ~ ~ ~

FORTE FEMME: Women's Sensual Dominance Weekend Intensive

Forte Femme returns to Toronto and San Francisco!
This very special immersion weekend is limited to 12 women.

TORONTO Forte Femme, hosted by Come As You Are boutique:
When: Fri 6/19 through Sun 6/21 (Fri, 7pm – 10pm, Sat 9am – 6pm, Sun 9am – 6pm)
Where: A lovely, elegant hotel suite. Inquire with CAYA for specifics.
Cost: $475/per person. The last round of Forte Femme at this last-century tuition rate.
Register: http://tinyurl.com/ForteFemmeCAYA or call CAYA at 416.504.7934 or toll-free 1.877.858.3160
* Meals and field trips are not included in the Toronto weekend.

SAN FRANCISCO Forte Femme:
When: Fri 8/14 through Sun 8/16 (Fri, 7pm – 10pm, Sat 9am – 6pm, Sun 9am – 6pm)
Where: Hyatt Regency San Francisco Airport
Cost: $650/per person.
Register: Registration opens on Friday, June 26th on-line at www.FHP-inc.com

= = = = = =

Weekend Detail:

Join Midori for this special women's weekend intensive of instruction and fun! The class is limited to 12 women to ensure the highest quality tutelage. Experience a most unique, in-depth program on how to bring the joys of sensual power play to your relationship.
Expanding on Midori's ever-popular class "The Art of Feminine Dominance," you'll be fully tutored through a series of personalized instruction, practice, discussions and demonstrations. Midori believes in a compassionate approach of education focusing on “Head-Heart-&-Hands”, to go beyond merely focusing on the technique or formulaic scripts.

Find your authentic inner femme power! Through exploration of safe and effective techniques with emphasis on connections with your partner, fortified with individual attention and guidance, you'll learn the full scope of creating an amazing experience for you and your partner.

During this immersion retreat, you'll learn creative negotiation, scene setting, special equipment, play techniques including flogging, various bondage types and more. You will also explore emotional and psychological issues of loving SM in a healthy relationship.

If you have a partner, they are encouraged to join in the Lab segment on Sunday afternoon.

Included: Workbook, morning coffee & nosh, lunch, afternoon snacks, fun goodies, plus optional guided field trip into San Francisco.


= = =

Toronto classes this week and different ones in June too

I'm coming to Toronto this week and again in June. It's always such a pleasure to return to Toronto!

Here's what I'm teaching. Let me know what questions you have for me on these.

TORONTO, CANADA
~ Wed 5/6 “Bedroom Burlesque and Seduction for Beginners: Wiggle, Jiggle, Take It Off with Confidence! (Women Only)” at Red Tent Sisters. 810 Danforth Ave. Toronto, ON M4J 1L6. Tel. (416) 463-8368
http://www.redtentsisters.com

~ 5/7 – 5/9 "Kinkalicious" 3 day sexy fun-fest!
Presenting 3 workshops;
“Becoming the Fantasy: Erotic Role Play for Couples”
“Aural Sex: Seduction by Voice”
“Art of Feminine Dominance”
http://kinkalicious.wordpress.com/

~ 6/19 – 6/21 “Forte Femme: Sensual Dominance Weekend Intensive”
http://tinyurl.com/ForteFemmeCAYA

Oh my art prank at Femina Potens "Art of Restraint" show went really well!
hmmm I hope they invite me back because I have some fun ideas for more performances.
:)